No Edges

Look here, I'ma only say this once. (Well I think this might be twice.) I'm tired of seeing you ladies walking around with no edges. If you don't know about the 'no edges' phenomenon, it's when a woman has worn her weave so tight or so much that the edges of her hair have eroded. Yes, eroded.  I was in the grocery store recently and my cashier had surpassed 'no edges' and had gone into the 'no forehead' territory. I wanted to yank her moldy weave out of her scalp but then I remembered that I can't fight.

Ladies, I know y'all think long hair is sexy but there's nothing sexy about prematurely balding because you couldn't let go of your weave.  And let me tell you, from personal experience, there's nothing sexier than a fly chick with a cute short hair cut.

New New

Oh, I don't have anything to say I just wanted to show yall my new cut.

...And a close up...

Get yo weave!

As a card carrying member of the Weavy Wonder club, I think I'm in a position to have an honest conversation with you ladies.  Some of yalls weaves are un-ac-ceptable.  I've already shared my disdain for lacefronts so I won't harp on that again.  But, just because you're not wearing a lacefront, doesn't mean your hair is on point.  Lemme give you a few examples:

The Exposed Track:

Classic (and rookie) weave fail.  There should always be enough hair to cover your tracks...just like in life.

Unkempt Weave: 

If you gotta unkempt weave, I am only to assume you have an unkempt life. Just ask my friend Nay about her roomie Lil. The first time I met Lil, her hair was lookin crazy and she, in turn, ended up being crazy.

The Ridiculous Color:

No one, in the history of the world, was born with blue & purple hair.  Now, as a Blonde Bombshell, I think a lil color is fine.  I've done a red streak or 2 in my day.  But your WHOLE HEAD in purple?? Ummm, nooooo.

Smelly Weave: 

Just because you have a weave does not mean you shouldn't wash your hair. Your weave will trap all kinds of smells (sweat, cigarettes, desperation) so make sure you stick to a regular hair care schedule.

The Braxtons:

Disclaimer: I do love the Braxtons, I don't always love their hair.  The evolution of the Braxtons weave has been impressive...

...but they ain't there yet.

To all my Sewn-in Sisters, I fully support your choice for enhancement...just make sure you look good doin it!

Blonde Bombshell

Yes, you read that right...I'm a blonde now.  Well, not entirely.  I am still an education professional by day.

So, as I told yall a while back, I LOVED the blonde streaks on A Belle in Brooklyn.  So I went to my local hair & wig shop on 125th St. (HARLEM!) and bought a pack of 613.  What, yall thought I was gonna dye my own hair?? Uhhhhhh, nah.  

When my stylist first put the blonde in, I had a slight heart attack ... cuz it was ... well, blonde.  But I love how it turned out!  Hey, it's something new & fresh for spring right.

This pic is courtesy of my fabulous co-worker!

Dress & Denim Jacket - Forever 21

But, I can't get my hair wet

...the famous last words of every Black girl on the planet.

As Black women we are more attached to our hair then anything else.  Ask a Black women if she would rather be bald or lose an arm....9 times outta 10, she'd rather be maimed.  I get it, I too am extremely attached to my hair, but as Black women we miss out on some stuff simply because we don't wanna get our hair wet.

Swimming: Yeah, we go swimming, but there is definitely preparation that goes into it.  Not to mention those horrible looking swim caps which went out in 1924.  Riding in convertibles:  Well, I dunno if we're actually missing out on anything here, but I've never done it and probably never will.  Working out: I used this excuse for 23 years ... which explains how I ballooned up to 250 pounds.

Long hair, short hair, natural or weave; ladies we are beautiful either way!  Just please, oh please...

stay away from lacefronts!