Let's Split the Check

We've all been there.  You're out to eat with your friends enjoying the fellowship, appetizers, camaraderie and cocktails.  Everyone is having a great time til that dreaded moment...the check arrives.  You begin looking over the bill to add up what you consumed when that lone voice yells out over the table ... "Let's just split it." 

*Death eyes*

Splitting the check is so contentious, it's rumored, to be the cause of World War II.  Friendships have ended over splitting the check.  People have starved over splitting the check.  Men and women have relegated themselves to water and croutons over splitting the check.  When you decide to split the check, you see who your real friends are.  Will your friend who ordered steak over your salad speak up?  Will that friend who's mad cheap finally come through being the cheapskate that she is?  After all, your only other option to splitting the check is spending the next 30 minutes haggling with your friends over how much tax to leave on their third of a $12 calamari appetizer.

Now, I don't know if Ms. Emily Post has a rule on the proper etiquette come check time but Div's rules go a lil something like this:

If everyone is eating, drinking, and being merry, just split the check evenly.  Especially if you're in a restaurant where the entrees are reasonably and similarly priced.  Now, if some people are on their 4th cocktail while others just got dessert, get your calculators out...you're in for a long, numerically taxing night.